Give me a mullet, please

I’ve finally gotten around to implementing a mullet-style layout on the front page and a long-tail archive. Here’s what the mullet looks like, as you can also see by going to the main page:

What it does is display the full text of the first five articles, then display short 30-word excerpts for the next 20. That’s an extra 15 articles on the front page, taking up the same amount of space (probably less!).

Extending the same idea to the archive:

Thanks to Jonathan Boutelle for the original idea, Kapil Mohan for the mullet code, and Gopalarathnam for the long-tail archive code.

And just for the record, I’d never wear a mullet-style haircut. Ever. :)

If you ever do consider the outdated coiff, this link will help dissuade you from tarnishing your tendrils.

http://www.ctgilles.net/images/pictars/mulletfamily.jpg

Oy vey.

By the way, the unfortunate child of Ma and Pa Mullet looks like an extra from the LOTR flicks.

The hobbit, circa 1985.

Looking good, ben!

I asked Mary to try imagining you with a mullet. Her response: “Oh, yuck… that’s the ugliest picture I’ve ever seen.” Suffice it to say, I think that’s one hairstyle you shouldn’t try.

Mary also told me she was supposed to deliver to me a message of sorts. But she forgot what it was. Care to fill me in?

Clarification: You told Mary to tell me to post something on my blog…?

Terrah: Pzzghlhyyyphlickkkk. Yes, that did a pretty good job at reinforcing my decision. (Though the hobbit kid does look kind of cool, as long as you consider her as a hobbit and not as a human. :P)

Jonathan: Thanks! :)

Katherine: One of these days I’ll Photoshop a mullet onto me, just to quantify exactly how revolting it is on the Richter scale. A nine, anyone? :) As for the message, Mary was telling me about the high school essays you used to correct and all of the interesting turns of phrases you came across (like the boy who wrote that he knew someone who “caught” cancer — and to think that all these years I thought it wasn’t contagious!). So yes, you should post some of them on your blog. If/when you do, leave a link here.

The worst part is… I think it (yes, it) might actually be a little boy! Aaaaaaggghhhhhh!!!

I did post a few some time ago:

http://belcinismo.blogspot.com/2005/02/we-have-bright-future-in-store.html

Tragically, the rest of them were lost in the Great Hard Drive Crash of ‘05 (along with several months’ worth of journal and other such things… I’m now notoriously anal-retentive about backing up my files and urging everyone else to do the same).

These aren’t from that particular job, but they’re similar:

http://belcinismo.blogspot.com/2005/10/for-your-reading-pleasure.html
http://belcinismo.blogspot.com/2006/03/wisdom-from-youth-of-utah-valley_16.html

And I’ll definitely need to see that mullet picture, so I expect you to get to work in Photoshop.

LOL :) Here are some of my favorite howlers:

“Oedipus hopped on the matrimony pony with his mom…”

“What could be better than the best car loan rate? Getting the best car loan rate is!”

“Only in America do we have seasons.”

“If you don’t want God in the Pledge of Allegiance, you should move to a country that doesn’t have freedom of religion so you can say whatever you want.”

“We should feel safe in America knowing we have the right to bare [sic] arms.”

“Many racists are still on the earth today; they are hypocrites because most of them are turning their own skin black by having tattoos all over their bodies.”

Thanks for the links. I’ll let you know when I have the mullet picture done…