Comments on: Requiem for the wallflower http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/ "Hitch your wagon to a star." —Ralph Waldo Emerson Thu, 20 Nov 2008 00:00:54 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.2 By: Ben http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-65472 Ben Sat, 23 Feb 2008 05:16:11 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-65472 sixline: Amen. :) Carly: Ah, but in the blogosphere, the past is the present. :) And thanks for your appreciation -- I'm glad you saw it for what it was. :) sixline: Amen. :)

Carly: Ah, but in the blogosphere, the past is the present. :) And thanks for your appreciation — I’m glad you saw it for what it was. :)

]]> By: Carly http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-65050 Carly Wed, 20 Feb 2008 01:18:21 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-65050 Um, you will probably never read this since it is February and I have just discovered your blog. But I just wanted to say thanks. I know the issue is debatable and both sides are, of course, at fault. But, I really appreciate your willingness to look at it from the female point of view. BYU is a crazy place when it comes to dating (I think we should all write books about it)--and can be particularly hard for those who simply don't. I really appreciate your sincerity. Um, you will probably never read this since it is February and I have just discovered your blog. But I just wanted to say thanks. I know the issue is debatable and both sides are, of course, at fault. But, I really appreciate your willingness to look at it from the female point of view. BYU is a crazy place when it comes to dating (I think we should all write books about it)–and can be particularly hard for those who simply don’t. I really appreciate your sincerity.

]]> By: sixline http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58492 sixline Sat, 22 Dec 2007 06:01:32 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58492 Dave: 3/40?! That's horrible! I don't know if my ego would have recovered. High five to you for fighting through that... Dave: 3/40?! That’s horrible! I don’t know if my ego would have recovered. High five to you for fighting through that…

]]> By: Ben http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58487 Ben Sat, 22 Dec 2007 05:38:13 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58487 Keep me posted. :) Keep me posted. :)

]]> By: David http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58430 David Fri, 21 Dec 2007 17:53:39 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58430 I did. It's called Life the Universe and Everything. It's pretty out of date. I think the URL is www.davidlayton.blogspot.com. I should change that. I did. It’s called Life the Universe and Everything. It’s pretty out of date. I think the URL is http://www.davidlayton.blogspot.com. I should change that.

]]> By: Ben http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58281 Ben Thu, 20 Dec 2007 05:55:40 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58281 Katherine: Pinnacles of awkwardness. I like that. :) Don't worry, I think awkwardness will seek me out regardless of my marital status. Trust me on this one. A: In the sidebar (on the website itself; if you're reading through Google Reader or something, they won't show up) there's a list of the most popular posts. As M points out, it's the watermelon post that skyrocketed to stardom (190,000 views as of this writing, which is out of this world). But I don't really count that, since most of the comments were...well, they all said the same thing. :) My <a href="http://www.topofthemountains.net/2006/06/09/lip-locked-lust/" rel="nofollow">Lip-locked lust</a> post has 69 comments, which was more than I expected to get. But it's interesting how most of those most popular posts kind of revolve around the same sorts of topics -- the only one that doesn't obviously fit is <a href="http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/04/09/crooked-perspective/" rel="nofollow">Crooked perspective</a>, and even then it's not that far off. Fascinating. Lesson learned: if you want lots of comments, post about [fill in the blank], with the blank being whatever generalization you can pull out of those post topics. ;) M: Yes. :) David: Good examples -- thanks for posting them. And you still need to start your own blog. :) Katherine: Pinnacles of awkwardness. I like that. :) Don’t worry, I think awkwardness will seek me out regardless of my marital status. Trust me on this one.

A: In the sidebar (on the website itself; if you’re reading through Google Reader or something, they won’t show up) there’s a list of the most popular posts. As M points out, it’s the watermelon post that skyrocketed to stardom (190,000 views as of this writing, which is out of this world). But I don’t really count that, since most of the comments were…well, they all said the same thing. :) My Lip-locked lust post has 69 comments, which was more than I expected to get. But it’s interesting how most of those most popular posts kind of revolve around the same sorts of topics — the only one that doesn’t obviously fit is Crooked perspective, and even then it’s not that far off. Fascinating. Lesson learned: if you want lots of comments, post about [fill in the blank], with the blank being whatever generalization you can pull out of those post topics. ;)

M: Yes. :)

David: Good examples — thanks for posting them. And you still need to start your own blog. :)

]]> By: David http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58264 David Thu, 20 Dec 2007 04:30:17 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58264 I can see the argument from both ends. Men are entirely insecure and are afraid of misleading or misreading females. Unfortunately, this often happens. There is hope though. Story #1 My sister went two years at BYU without getting asked on a single date. Now, my sister is pretty, fun, and smart (I mean, she graduated BYU at age 20), but during this time, she was depressed, kept to herself, and didn't talk to many people. She made some new friends and changed her attitude and all of a sudden, she became the most popular person I knew. She was going on two to three dates a week from random people, getting asked out in the weirdest places by complete strangers, and was even proposed to three times on first dates!! She later married her ballroom partner from high school. Was it coincidence? Did her countenance change with her confidence? I don't know, but I do know that overnight, prospects can change. Story #2 Between the end of Sept. 2006 and March 2007, I asked out at least two girls a month. Sometimes up to 8 or 9. Every girl said yes. Every date except three canceled our date within two days to 30 min. before the date. I did have some lucky family home evening sisters who were blessed with accompanying me on my prepaid tickets (despite the fact that some had boyfriends and they were attending with me as a friend). I mean 3/40 or so is not good odds. Was it me? I don't know. Was it dumb luck that roommates would break their legs, families would come to kidnap their daughters for the weekend, or dance rehearsals ate up their time and they had to write a paper instead of going on a date? Once again, the answer is beyond me. Story #3 My friend Raven didn't date much if at all. There happened to be a hunk of a ballroom dancer in her ward. He was handsome, talented, and softspoken. Perhaps he was a little too softspoken, because he didn't date despite the multitude of ladies who had crushes on him. Raven decided she liked him and they were going to go out. She asked him out. He obliged. She asked him out again. He obliged. She asked him out again. They have been married for three years now and all because she took the initiative to ask someone out who was too busy and too shy to do it himself. (I was also a ballroom dancer and know the hectic schedule). So my friends, to conclude this insanely long post that could be a blog entry in itself, there is hope. For guys and gals. It may come from chance. It may come from a change in attitude. It may come from someone taking the initiative to change their own destiny. Hey, I even manged to date a girl, introduce her to my friend, get dumped and see her and my friend get engaged a month later. This happened not once but twice. We never know how or when it will happen, but even those sisters who have been date deprived may find themselves changing their perspective at a moments notice. I can see the argument from both ends. Men are entirely insecure and are afraid of misleading or misreading females. Unfortunately, this often happens. There is hope though.
Story #1
My sister went two years at BYU without getting asked on a single date. Now, my sister is pretty, fun, and smart (I mean, she graduated BYU at age 20), but during this time, she was depressed, kept to herself, and didn’t talk to many people. She made some new friends and changed her attitude and all of a sudden, she became the most popular person I knew. She was going on two to three dates a week from random people, getting asked out in the weirdest places by complete strangers, and was even proposed to three times on first dates!! She later married her ballroom partner from high school. Was it coincidence? Did her countenance change with her confidence? I don’t know, but I do know that overnight, prospects can change.
Story #2
Between the end of Sept. 2006 and March 2007, I asked out at least two girls a month. Sometimes up to 8 or 9. Every girl said yes. Every date except three canceled our date within two days to 30 min. before the date. I did have some lucky family home evening sisters who were blessed with accompanying me on my prepaid tickets (despite the fact that some had boyfriends and they were attending with me as a friend). I mean 3/40 or so is not good odds. Was it me? I don’t know. Was it dumb luck that roommates would break their legs, families would come to kidnap their daughters for the weekend, or dance rehearsals ate up their time and they had to write a paper instead of going on a date? Once again, the answer is beyond me.
Story #3
My friend Raven didn’t date much if at all. There happened to be a hunk of a ballroom dancer in her ward. He was handsome, talented, and softspoken. Perhaps he was a little too softspoken, because he didn’t date despite the multitude of ladies who had crushes on him. Raven decided she liked him and they were going to go out. She asked him out. He obliged. She asked him out again. He obliged. She asked him out again. They have been married for three years now and all because she took the initiative to ask someone out who was too busy and too shy to do it himself. (I was also a ballroom dancer and know the hectic schedule).

So my friends, to conclude this insanely long post that could be a blog entry in itself, there is hope. For guys and gals. It may come from chance. It may come from a change in attitude. It may come from someone taking the initiative to change their own destiny. Hey, I even manged to date a girl, introduce her to my friend, get dumped and see her and my friend get engaged a month later. This happened not once but twice. We never know how or when it will happen, but even those sisters who have been date deprived may find themselves changing their perspective at a moments notice.

]]> By: M http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58259 M Thu, 20 Dec 2007 03:20:38 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58259 20 just barely gets it on the "Most Commented" list, A. A benign post about watermelons that never hurt anyone has over a hundred. 20 just barely gets it on the “Most Commented” list, A. A benign post about watermelons that never hurt anyone has over a hundred.

]]> By: A http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58242 A Wed, 19 Dec 2007 22:18:06 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58242 What's the most amount of comments you've had on a post, Ben? 19 is pretty up there, friend. What’s the most amount of comments you’ve had on a post, Ben? 19 is pretty up there, friend.

]]> By: Katherine M http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58112 Katherine M Tue, 18 Dec 2007 12:55:48 +0000 http://www.topofthemountains.net/2007/12/16/requiem-for-the-wallflower/#comment-58112 Wow, Ben, between these comments and your Francis post, yesterday was definitely a day of reaching new pinnacles of awkwardness on your blog. This is just the sort of thing I'm talking about--of course I wouldn't have you stop posting after you're married. I just don't think you'd get the same kinds of interesting discussions and wonderfully awkward comments as you do on these kinds of posts. Wow, Ben, between these comments and your Francis post, yesterday was definitely a day of reaching new pinnacles of awkwardness on your blog. This is just the sort of thing I’m talking about–of course I wouldn’t have you stop posting after you’re married. I just don’t think you’d get the same kinds of interesting discussions and wonderfully awkward comments as you do on these kinds of posts.

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